It's Friday night. You're warming up a frozen pizza in the oven while playing SEGA. Maybe after the pizza is done, you'll watch a scary movie. It's Halloween time after all, time for some creepy fun. Hey... how about calling that scary phone hotline? Heck yeah! This will be great! Time to take a JOURNEY INTO TERROR!
... is someone at my door?
If you look up 'dope' in the dictionary, the definition will just be a picture of the Velocitron Speedia 500 collection. Transformers Legacy is a really cool toy line as is, but when adding in the Buzzworth Bumblebee and Velocitron Spedia 500 segments, it gets pretty amazing. I think the funny part of myself enjoying the Velocitron stuff so much is that... I was pretty passive with Velocitron when Cybertron first aired. It was neat, sure, but I was more interested in the Jungle Planet. Though I really liked the race planets inhabitants. I'd love to see Ransack and Crumplezone make a return for this new sub-line. Dang, that'd be great.
I don't mention Target enough here. Sure, I do when it comes to Transformers and everything. But they are a serious retail force when it comes to Halloween. They're one of the big retailers people look to for great stuff during the spooky season. Costumes, decor, candy, neat shit... they've got it. That cool orange skeleton with the pumpkin head everyone's after this year? That's Target. Mines sitting proudly on my porch right now! They always bring the noise each year. Just look at this commercial from 1995. That's prime Halloween.
Rank- Rock Lord/Good Leader
Body Type- Tungsten: among the toughest of all minerals, it shows durability and resolve.
Weapon- Power SwordBrave and wise with an awesome physique, Boulder leads the defense of Quartex against Magmar's villainous plots. Boulder has rallied the remaining free kingdoms of the planet under his leadership. His fiery temper strikes fear into friend and foe alike. In the heat of battle, he scatters enemies with stun-gun blasts and zaps them with his Power Sword.
I first discovered Arctic Circle a few years ago during Pumpkin Spiced Mayhem here on the site. Since then I've been a little jealous that the restaurant isn't anywhere near me as... dude it looks pretty good. The Square Pumpkin kids meal looks like a pretty great time. I'd love to grab one from the drive through while out looking at Halloween lights. In this commercial they have a great mini strobe light included with the Square Pumpkin meal as you absolutely must have some sort of light on you while trick or treating. Arctic Circle is on the up and up. Real ones know.
The new McFarlane toys version of Super Powers is pretty great. So far I've gotten Batman and Superman and plan to get more. The original line by Kenner was a lot of fun back in the day. I can't help but to want all the new ones with all the fond memories of these guys I have. I hope they make more, but I should focus on getting the ones out now. The new figures are little different, but still have the same charm of the old ones. They're currently Walmart exclusive, but I hope to one day find them at other stores. Just so I can one day walk into a grocery store to find a years old Green Lantern with yellowed packaging still on the shelves. Just like in the good old days.
I've said it time and time again- you need safety lights during Halloween. Be it trick or treating, or maybe just in the pumpkin instead of a candle. In 1983 Taco Bell had your back and your back side after eating. For just 29 cents you could purchase a glow stick! That's a steal considering they're a dollar now... probably more... *sigh*. Not bad at all. Stop by Taco Bell, get dinner and a glow stick. Go trick or treating safely as we all know kids are invisible to cars on the one night that kids are out en masse at night in the streets. Then have a convenient light for all those bathroom trips you'll be making later. It's a win win!
Rank- Evil rock warriors
Body Type- Anthracite (coal) and magnetite: a dangerous combination of minerals that causes sparks.
Weapon- Cactus Club (Sticks): Double-Duty Mace (Stones)
Sticks 'N Stones are living proof that two heads are worse than one. They're constantly at odds with each other. But give them a single purpose-destroying good rocks- and they become an awesome fighting force. The very sight of them charging into battle with their Cactus Club and Double-Duty Mace is enough to send enemies flying home!
Thanks for coming back for another week on Planet Zone! It's the last week of September meaning we've got one more month of Halloween fun! Since it'll actually be October, it's gonna be extra spooky! I had a fun weekend that I wish wasn't over already. The Mrs picked up Legacy Tarrantulas for me Friday night on a Target run for cat food. Saturday while picking up our grocery order I finally found Studio Series Spike. I love a good Core Class toy. We spent most of the weekend at home, but Sunday we stepped out for a Squishmallow event at Five Below and I grabbed Gorthion from the Bakugan Mystic Pack set they sell there. I neek to research some of the molds they use there as I think some of those versions need to come home with me! I've got a fun week planned for you Zone Base readers. Thanks so much for continuing to support the site. As usual, I don't ask anything from you. No ads, no begging, and no capitalizing. All I ask is that you share with your friends. It's fun that way!
Spooky season is in full gear this month as Rob talks about Transformers EarthSpark and that cool ReAction Unicron before Halloween Kinder Eggs and costumes are discussed. Not just any costume, THE HALLOWEEN COSTUME… yeah, it's serious.
As much as I love Stranger Things, Vecna stole a beat or two from the Grinch in this classic Halloween cartoon. I still remember watching it on Disney Channel back in the days that Stranger Things is set in reeling in the nightmare that the Grinch brought with him. Though, as an adult, I'm not scared anymore. While I love the cartoon... it's hard to look past the fact that Euchariah has to take a shit the entire special.
In fact... it's a stinky smell that sets off everything. That 'sour-sweet wind' that gets the Gree-Grumps and Hakken-Krakks going. I mean... it must be Halloween, something stinks and those things are yelling. So everyone goes inside and it isn't until Euchariah has to take a shit and gets blown away by that smelly wind on the way to the outhouse. It must really smell bad, because you can hear the Grinch throw up at one point.
Euchariah (a Who whom needs to poop) foils the Grinch's plans by subjecting himself to all sorts of nightmare within the paraphernalia wagon (while having to shit). This is exactly what Max (from Stranger Things, not the dog) did in season 4. Presumably not while holding a deuce. Or maybe... but who could blame her?
I bet the sour-sweet wind was just the Grinch holding his ass open in front of a fan
I'll never forget the first time I saw this classic. I rented Godzilla 1985 and Double Dragon from the local video store. As amazing weekend was in store. When it was my turn with the VCR, I popped my movie in and... had to adjust the tracking a whole lot. Finally when the picture became viewable, this little cartoon appeared on my TV. I now understand why the tape was in such poor condition, I must have re-winded that little clip a million times.
I'm way more familiar with the Kooky Spooks Make-Up kits than their costume brand. To be honest, I've only learned of these costumes in the more recent years. Before I go any further, can we all give a round of applause for that great music shared across the Kooky Spooks commercial universe? It's so great! I'm not so sure I would have liked these costumes though. The allure of an inflatable costume is hard to resist. Just... a giant inflatable hat just doesn't say "hey, wear this all night".
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| "The Ocean Depths conceal all intentions." |
Function: Tracker, Ocean Attack
Detecting Predacon activity from over 20,000 fathoms below the ocean surface, Cybershark hunts his enemies at over 600 knots. From there, little room is left for escape. Armor-piercing, jaw-mounted sonar tracer torpedoes have water-to-air capabilities. Spin-drive tail boosts speed and acts as quad-blade razor weapon in attack and robot modes. Also deploys thruster jets for higher speed and limited low-level flight. A fierce warrior, Cybershark honed his skills while bounty hunting a rogue band of Cybertronian space pirates. Fully dedicated to the Maximal cause, he often follows his own methods to the frustration of his commander, Depth Charge. Calculating and fearless, he gives Predacons a good reason to stay out of the water.
Strength: 7.9 Intelligence: 5.3 Speed: 6.4 Endurance: 5.8 Rank: 7.0 Courage: 9.8 Firepower: 7.1 Skill: 6.5
Heinz Scarios were a spooky shaped pasta in sauce available throughout the 80's in Canada. For the record, I'm very jealous of those of you in Canada who were able to eat these. They look amazing. Admittedly I'd probably eat them all year, but it would be perfect on a cold October night spent inside watching Sleepy Hollow.
I recently got the Mobile Change Haro toys that I've talked about earlier. This lead me down a weird rabbit hole that I thought would make a good post here. I might be wrong about that, it might be a terrible post. Either way, it's a post and it's here. I've talked about Doozy Bots before, but just in case you're not in the know- Doozy Bots was an early 90's attempt to bring Gundam to the US. It would have used SD Gundam designs and had a new cartoon that was pretty similar to cartoons like Captain N that were popular at the time. Let's watch the pitch reel again.
I've said it before and I'll say it again. I would have loved this. I know me, and I remember the me I was then. Doozy Bots would have and likely still be my jam. I like Gundam, but I'm not super invested in the fiction. It's mostly thinking the robots are cool. I'll buy a toy or Gunpla and play the occasional game because I like the robots. I don't follow the cartoons super heavy though. I did really like SD Gundam and can tell I would have loved Doozy Bots. I would still love Doozy Bots. So, what if Doozy Bots would have actually happened? Like... say there was a timeline or there's an alternate timeline going on right now... and these way cool Mobile Change Haro figures are newer Doozy Bots toys... whoa...
In celebration of the 50th anniversary of Godzilla vs Gigan, Toho will be releasing a short cgi film November 3rd. 'Godzilla vs Gigan Rex' will debut during Godzillafest on Toho's YouTube channel! Anytime is a good time for Gigan!
You probably guessed after watching the above commercial that I would talk about how much I love Halloween make-up kits. However I just wanted to throw out some love to kooky Spooks for outright using the cheapness of the make up as a selling point. Real ones know cheaper Halloween make up usually cracks on your face as it dries. Kooky Spooks cracks as it dries to give the illusion that it's old and gross skin. Way to go Kooky Spooks... just passing off your cheap ass product as psoriasis.
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| "The search often begins within yourself." |
Function: Reconnaissance
Vice Grip is one of Megatron's most loyal and dependable troops. He understands the value of a mission and does his utmost to complete it successfully. This drive, coupled by his extraordinary tracking abilities, is well received by the Predacon leader. His comrades have deep respect for him and often look to him for guidance and advice. In insect mode, his rear pincers can easily crush unsuspecting Maximals, and then finish them off with a high-voltage electric surge. I robot mode, the pincers convert to a hand-held pulse weapon that discharges an explosive ball of electricity capable of shorting out Maximals in a twenty meter radius.
Strength: 8 Intelligence: 5 Speed: 5 Endurance: 7 Rank: 5 Courage: 8 Firepower: 6 Skill: 7
It's a new week here on Planet Zone and with it a whole new week of robots, monsters, and misadventure! Does the place look different? Or does it look familiar? Well, the 'new' Zone Base look never quite sat right with me. So, no time better than to go back to the classic look than Halloween! Bio week was fun, but also gave me a little extra time to rework the site. It may look like it used to, but I made a few more improvements while at it. Hope you all like the return to the Zone Base of yesterday! We're halfway through Halloween already (somehow), but don't worry, there's still half a season of Pumpkin Spiced Mayhem to go! I've got a fun week of spooky shit to go along with the regular content that's sure to be a lot of fun! Make sure you share with your friends so they can wonder what's wrong with me too!
This I lucked out as far as toys go. Saturday brought this years Halloween Hot Wheels set and a bunch of Eternia Minis I'd been looking for. I only intended to get the Mrs some exclusive Squishmallows at that Kroger and walked away happily. Super Powers Superman and two Micro Galaxy Squadron blind boxes were bought at Walmart. While running out to get some cat food Sunday, the Mrs picked up Jhiaxus and Perceptor from Target. Overall a pretty good haul! Now that I finally found those blind boxes, I can let myself buy the full sized toys. Don't ask me why I set that rule for myself, I just did and it was a fun mission to partake.
Oh, the boxes wielded The Mandelorian with the speeder bike he had in episode 2. Guess it was a speeder bike kinda day, because the other box had a Biker Scout with a Speeder Bike. Super cool! I wasn't sure if I wanted to complete the new Super Powers line... but I just might. Two figures in and I'm super happy. Eternia Minis are allegedly ending and that makes me sad. Hopefully I'll find more like I did this weekend. I'd been looking for Perceptor and Jhiaxus, so its nice to finally have them. Specially an accurate Jhiaxus, I was ok with his other toys, but it's great to have the one I've wanted all this time. I've always really liked Perceptor, so it's only natural to want this figure. I get the Halloween Hot Wheels set every year and was happy to this year as well. It's a simple tradition, but a fun one.
Oh no! There's a witch causing problems for children on Halloween! What do we do! SEND IN ULTRAMAN! It's Halloween and the GUTS team suspects a monster. The team investigates (in costumes, it's Halloween... duh) and soon discovers a witch handing out lollipops to children. Trick or Treat? It's a TRICK! The witch is stealing the children's dreams and converting them into energy! Good thing Ultraman Tiga is here to save Halloween!
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| "Speak now if you intend to ever speak at all." |
Function: Interrogator
His violent temper often overcomes his natural curiosity. More willing to whittle down his captives with his fists than with his words. Few survive his interrogations long enough to reveal anything useful. Can record up to 6000 hours of testimony. Equipped with two compression cannons, which crush a target with tons of compressed air pressure. Combines with Squawktalk to form robot Squawkbox.
Strength: 7 Intelligence: 5 Speed: 3 Endurance: 6 Rank: 6 Courage: 7 Firepower: 4 Skill: 3
"Hey man, it's Halloween. Let's do something scary!" You might find yourself saying during this time of the year. It's the Spooky Season after all, and nothing says that better than a trip to the local haunted house or scary attractions set up for the season. In 2000, you might have found yourself at the Horror Hotel surrounded by masks and dummies of famous monsters! It sounds like a great time, even though somebodies Aunt keeps trying to scare you.
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| "A life without risk is a life without reward." |
Function: Field Commander
A rowdy, rebellious robot. Likes to be where the action is! At his best crashing his titanium-steel, self propelled cannon through enemy barricades, just so he can unload his x-ray laser cannon, sonic boomers and automatic machine gun at the Decepticons. Converts his ATV vehicle into a battle station and helipad. Also equipped with awesome ultra-violet radar that guards against Decepticon attacks!
Strength: 7 Intelligence: 7 Speed: 3 Endurance: 8 Rank: 8 Courage: 10 Firepower: 8 Skill: 8
It's Halloween and not even Thomas the Tank Engine is safe from a scary night. You know, it's pretty easy to dismiss something like this going in. I haven't really watched Thomas. been aware of him? Sure. Watched it? Nope. Then until I ran across this episode. I was really impressed with the spooky atmosphere and just how well made the whole thing is. I'm sure I'm not the only person to drive down a country road on a foggy night. It's creepy and they've captured that feeling really well. It's particularity impressive considering the entire thing is done with miniatures.
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| "An engine is only as powerful as the fuel that runs it." |
Function: Fuel Depot
A small-minded swindler. Siphons gas from the cars of humans to supply his Decepticon comrades. In battle Mode, his station is armed with ionic cannons, rail-launched incendiary missiles and circuit-scrambling jammers. Tower-mounted sonic disruptor emits pressurized sound waves that can crush any target.
Strength: 4 Intelligence: 7 Speed:3 Endurance: 6 Rank: 7 Courage: 7 Firepower: 8 Skill: 9
Joey Lawrence keeps getting work for some reason. In today's post it was Coca Cola getting Joey and some friends to do a slasher parody as a Halloween commercial. Joey and his friends are enjoying a monster movie while drinking some Coke (naturally) when some hideous monster barges in and takes one! LOL, it's just his older sister in a face mask! They kinda had me until that part. You get a pretty good lead up, build, setting... it just feels like a slasher movie. Aside from Joey Lawrence, it was pretty good.
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| "My price is too high and you're going to pay." |
Function: Aerial Defense
A black market barbarian. His airport is equipped with retractile tire shredding spikes that prevent enemy invasions. In attack Mode, airport converts to mobile, dual missile battery with a range of over 300 miles. Control tower armed with atomic panels that short out optic sensors.
Strength: 1 Intelligence: 6 Speed:7 Endurance: 5 Rank: 6 Courage: 9 Firepower: 8 Skill: 8
It's Monday and that means the start of a new week! Thanks for letting my weird little site be a part of it! It's been a while since I've done a themed week and since you all seem to like the bios so much, it's Bio Week here on Zone Base! Halloween will go on as usual, but all regular site posts this week will be the bios of Transformers characters you probably don't think of a lot. I hope you all enjoy it as we sink firmly into the middle of the Halloween season... which is going by a lot faster than I'd like. However seeing the rest of the world have so much fun and fall (no pun intended... this time) back into a more normal groove of things with the season is great! Looks like we're going to have quite the spooky time this year.
This weekend was fun. The Mrs and I went to Walmart, Target, and Five Below. Somehow I found somentime to work on my room a little as it's pretty messy. A few hours a week should clear that up! We also watched the new Pinocchio movien and I got some of the new Cobra Kai season in. That'll likely get finished tomorrow after the follow up to the latest dentist visit is over. That should take care of that for the rest of the year, and this time I mean it. Winter means a few routine tests and its all the medical attention I can handle. I take back what I said about wanting to grow up when I was a kid.
As far as toys go, Shawn sent me Cosmos and Override! Finally the Velocitron Speedia 500 collection is complete! Thanks so much Shawn, getting all of these was pretty important to me. I also found and purchased the entire series of Mobile Change Haro! I've been looking forward to these little guys for a bit now. They're super exciting for me. I'll need to get the rest of the Gundam Infinity figures soon as well as a neat blind box line Target had.
The last blind box Gundams I got was in 2017, so it's about time! I also got 2 new Halloween Kinder Surprise eggs with their super awesome new trick or treaters figures. I'll be covering those more in depth in the future. More Halloween stuff was purchased as well as MOTU Origins Leach! I hope to complete the Evil Horde in Origins, but Grizzlor looks to be a challenge. I only planned to grab some TF Micro Machines and some Star Wars Micro Galaxy Squadron toys this weekend. I guess that'll be next weekend! Almost forgot to mention the Bakugan Fangzor bought at Five Below!
Like I said up top, this is going to be a week full of bios! Hope you all enjoy it as well as the fun Halloween content. I treat posts here as a gashapon machine, so hopefully you'll like the surprises in store! I won't spoil anything, but let's just say it's going to be Ultra cool! Thanks for reading Zone Base. If you like what I do, please share it with your friends. That's all I ask!
I've talked about Spooky Goop here before. It's one of those 'so good that I have to double dip' things. Sure to you, it may just be a make-up kit. One of many that would grace store shelves each year. I do love make-up kits (I've said that many times before as well) and Spooky Goop is a prime reason why. It's hard to ignore that packaging. I've spent lots of time just admiring the packaging for these kits at stores. In more recent years they've gotten a little bland, but in the past, they'd knock you over on presentation.
Then there's that cool coffin and test tube. Mixing together Spooky Goop is made part of the fun and if you're like me you'd been looking forward to finally mixing the concoction together after waiting all month for the big night. Make no mistake about it, they were playing off Mad Scientist. Even though that coffin was made from the thinnest plastic ever made- it was vital. Looking at this kit in the store. Then staring at it all October until it was finally time to use it. Ultimately getting thrown away as it wasn't mean to last is all part of the cycle of the goop. I know the chunky gross mixture probably fell off your face halfway through the night. The color was mostly sweated off as well. What was left was pretty hard to wash off when you got home and a little was in your hair still the next day. The memories though, are forever.
I like McDonald's for the most part. I say most part because there's been times that I didn't care so much for it, but I do like it. Always have. For some reason, I'm extremely fond of their Beast Wars Happy Meals. I like kids meal toys as is, they're fun. Aside from those wonderful Beast Wars Happy Meal toys, there's been some pretty neat Transformers items from McDonald's. Today I feel like talking about the Foodstrap figures.
These Foodstrap figures were fairly simple little toys of McDonald's food (with straps, get it?). By pushing a button, a Transformers character would pop out of the food. Just a little silly toy, ideal for a fast food promotion. What made them extra neat though was the integration of them into a regular Transformers toy. If you had a Transformers Chronicle Optimus Prime, there was a specific storage compartment in the trailer for these little toys. That's an odd feature... but a cool one.
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| Vote Now! |
Which new character from Transformers: Legacy is your favorite? The ruthless G2 Decepticon Jhiaxus? The powerful Laser Optimus Prime? Or are you excited to see the Pretenders back in action?
As you all know, we lost a great ally and friend of the Transformers brand in December 2021. In honor of his legacy, we want to know who your favorite character is from Transformers: Animated! Don’t see your fave on the list? Nominate your pick in the write-in section!
Voting is open from now until 11:59 PM on September 15, 2022.
Trick or Treating is FUN! You get dressed up, knock on doors, and get candy! Hey, I got an idea! Let's go to Uncle Donald's house. You know, the dickhead! Donald Duck decided to play tricks on Huey, Dewey, and Louie denying them of Halloween candy... from his house. Not sure why they didn't just move on... but Witch Hazel isn't having any of it. Magic spells, ghosts, and breaking doors open with skulls are abound!
You know... why didn't they just move on?
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| "Glory of death for my enemies, glory of victory for me!" |
Function: Decepticon General
Profile: After his defeat centuries ago by the Autobot Star Saber, Deathsaurus was recreated as one of the Generals in the Decepticon army. Having led many successful campaigns, he became frustrated as the Autobots and Maximals began to overwhelm the Decepticon/Predacon Alliance. His ultimate goal is to re-establish his title of Emperor of Destruction and return the Decepticon Empire to its former prominence. Savage, cruel and brilliant, Deathsaurus should never be underestimated. Deathsaurus hopes to use his Insecticon Clones to increase his power base.
Abilities: Deathsaurus' new form was engineered to have six distinct transforms including a dragon mode, an aerial vehicle mode and a high-speed ground mode. These forms, along with his dual Timelines blade weapon make him a formidable foe. Utilizing the unique materials in his wings, he can convert sunlight into dark energy, which will corrode any type of metal upon contact. Deathsaurus is one of the strongest Decepticons.
Weakness: Deathsaurus' arrogance allows him to believe his plans are fool proof, causing him to sometimes overlook potential flaws.
Strength: 9 Intelligence: 8 Speed: 7.6 Endurance: 9.2 Rank: 9 Courage: 8.5 Fireblast: 8.3 Skill: 8.7
I'm sure every local news broadcast on every channel will feature one of their personalities visiting a local haunted house. Most of the time said personality will get scared. It's funny to watch no matter how many times you see it. Being on the reviving end of getting scared is another story. Half of the time you start laughing immediately after, the other half ... takes a minute. I've worked in a few haunted houses and have seen the full variety of reactions. There's always the occasional person who has a little accident. Sometimes you smell it, sometimes you hear it (no, really), and sometimes you can just tell. After so many years, you already know when you see the face.
That poor lady just shit her pants on live TV.
Two years ago I walked into that Dollar Tree on a cold November day and discovered a new toy line called Final Faction. Like other early adopters of the line, I was blown away by this really cool set of figures reminiscent of 80's and 90's action figures available exclusively at the Dollar Tree of all places. Final Faction has since grown to be something special in the toy world. I'm glad I discovered it organically just walking into the store.
It's neat to be on something from the ground floor and I'd never had thought something like a discount store toy line would ever be cool. But here we are, and here it is. I'm mentally drawing comparisons to other discount likes like Dragon Riders of the Styx and The Other World. Even with the thematic differences, it's great to see something similar happening again. Most discount lines these days are discount versions of mainline brands so seeing an original creation like this is refreshing. In 2003 the line will have the new Venom and Elite series. I'm pretty excited to see it continue.
There was a time when these eye ball toys were literally everywhere. Taco Bell decided to sell wacky straws that held these eye ball toys as a Halloween promotion and whomever at corperate came up with that idea deserves the Nobel Peace Prize. Halloween is a season full of fun and it's not uncommon to get some fast food on the way home from the local haunted house. Having your monster straw stare at you while sipping that Mountain Dew with it's judging eyes... it knows what you did.
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| "Nobody wins a war - somebody loses." |
Function: Transport, Reconnaissance
Gears is anti-social, a self-proclaimed misfit. Finds fault in everything and everyone. Acts this way to help cheer others up as they try to cheer him up. Tremendous strength and endurance. Totes heavy loads long distances. Launches to height of 20 miles, floats down on compressed air. Becomes an easy target due to limited maneuverability. Can detect infrared.
Strength: 8 Intelligence: 7 Speed: 6 Endurance: 8 Rank: 6 Courage: 9 Firepower: 1 Skill: 7
It's Monday and you know what that means! Well, this week it means Labor Day and I'm enjoying the holiday weekend. Some much needed rest and relaxation is on order. Don't worry, regular posting will resume tomorrow. I hope everybody has a great day and thank you for supporting Zone Base. If you like what I do, please share with your friends! It's all I ask!
John Kilduff is another Public Access TV showman. On his programs, John likes to paint for the audience while taking calls. In this segment from his spooky Halloween episode in 2005, John is painting a skull of sorts. He explains to us the differences in brushes and color all while things get scary. His audience really appreciates it too as they call in and... it goes exactly how you'd think.
dang
That new unofficial Thunderhawk has had me thinking about M.A.S.K in general lately and I'm not sure if I've told this story here before... but I'm gonna today. I was fortunate to have quite a bit of M.A.S.K toys as a kid. I'm not sure if they were inexpensive or if I just got lucky, but I'm not complaining. Picture it, Christmas 1985 I hit the mother lode. The Fright Zone, Cobra Moray, Captain America Turbocopter, figures galore, and quite a bit of M.A.S.K! Included in that M.A.S.K haul was the Rhino! The Rhino was probably the coolest of the lot as it was this big semi truck with all sorts of action features. To this day I swear it's one of the better looking toys ever made.
However... there's no way it would pass a modern safety test. In the picture above, do you see that big rocket firing out the sleeper cab? That thing is DEATH TRAP. By pushing a button on the backside of the truck, with a loud KACHUNK, that rocket would fly out of the sleeper cab with the force of a thousand... I don't have an analogy, but it came out fast and hard. So hard that it knocked the roof open as it flew out with a vengeance. Because it flew straight up so hard and fast, the rocket itself was kinda heavy. I guess so it would fall down and not take the roof of your house. It was this big, thick heavy black plastic with a sharp point for some reason.
So there I was, happily placing the stickers upon the Rhino at the dinner table while my dad watched. Mom was in the kitchen cooking Christmas dinner. I rolled my new truck toy around after finishing stickering and played around with it's many features. Hey... how do I shoot that rocket? I looked all over, holding the back of the cab. Looking directly over the cab section when KACHUNK!
SHIT!
After a white flash I found myself reeling back in my chair, holding my head that now throbbing with pain. A small dent in my forehead, missile in my lap, and ANGRY father staring daggers at me from across the table. That shit I wrote a few words up there? Yeah, apparently I instantly screamed it out as the rocket knocked me back. Dad demanded to know what I just said. Myself afraid of getting in trouble while trying to see straight. In wrestling they call this getting your bell rung. Dad made sure I knew that I better not ever say that again while telling me to better be glad it was Christmas or I'd be in BIG trouble. Ironically we had just watched A Christmas Story the night before... but I never got the luxury of having my mouth washed out with soap. *ahem*
These days things like child safety laws come up and I'm usually pretty supportive. Between kids getting shot after pointing realistic toy guns at people, choking on missiles, or the above incident... I'd rather not see anybody get hurt. Some folks get all worked up over these laws, but oh well. They'll live... and so will the kids hopefully. I'm not sure if The Rhino had some sort of industrial strength spring in that thing or if the missile needed to be a potentially dangerous weapon but... I actually don't have a clever way to end this. That really hurt.
If you were a kid in Oakland County trick or treating on Halloween night 1995... you probably ran into the biggest wieners in the galaxy. Somebodies cousins decided to dress as a Klingon and host a 'fun' trick or treat party on public access TV. There, kids could have a safe and happy holiday while learning about Klingons. You can tell the kids loved it by Robin's excitement. No, no... he was excited... not ... the free candy wasn't worth it.
Function: Bombardier
Though large of form, however much matters are betrayed by Starscream's orders, he responds only with the single word "Roger" and carries out his duties faithfully. There may be some fateful trauma between the two. A rarity among the Destrons, he is a reliable soldier who has restrained his eccentric side. He can launch in rapid fire the Screamwinder missiles, which he shares with Starscream, from his BB Launcher.
Strength: 8 Intelligence: 4 Speed: 6 Endurance: 9 Rank: 5 Courage: 8 Firepower: 9 Skill: 7