Hordak [Turtles of Grayskull]

While Skeletor pouted over He-Man, Hordak plotted from afar, using his new minion Shredder, to infiltrate Snake Mountain. When the time is right, Hordak will strike, and all of Eternia will be his!

Being one of the big baddies of Masters of the Universe, it's not to any surprise that Hordak has made an appearance in Turtles of Grayskull. Being that it's Hordak, there's a twist! He's been secretly working with The Shredder under Skeletor's nose for an eventual swerve! Well... where a nose would be... Anyway Hordak makes an awesome appearance. I've made my affection for the Slime Pit known in the past, so it's to no surprising how excited I am to see TMNT worked into it. Hordak now runs the Ooze Pit dealing with Mutagen! He even has a Mutagen sprayer equipped to spew the potentially toxic stuff whenever the mood strikes! However, the leader of The Evil Horde mutated himself a little too. Those trademark bat Evil Horde symbols now extend to a pair of articulated bat wings sprouting from his back! Hordak is now the embodiment of that symbol! Like all Origins figures there's plenty of articulation that works well here. This is another solid figure in this awesome line... hey... now it makes sense as to why The Shredder came with that Horde style crossbow!

The evil of Hordak!

The new Masterverse Hordak is something special for me. Hordak is one of my favorite MOTU characters and on my top list of ultimate badass things. There's been a few Origins Hordak figures (and I have them), but this one is particularly nice. Like other Masterverse figures, Hordak comes with a plethora of extra parts. His laser cannon arm from the cartoon (with blast effect), alternate hands (including robotic), and the cape, shield, and crossbow his original toy came with. They are stylized to match the more serious look of the Masterverse figure... but it wouldn't be a tribute to him without them. Most Evil Horde members come packing that crossbow and that bat shield just completes Hordak's look. The cape is cloth and extra long giving him that classic evil villain look.

Like other Masterverse figures, Hordak has a ton of articulation. Since this is specifically meant to represent his appearance in the She-Ra cartoon, Hordak has his blue skin instead of the gray skin his orignal (and Origins) toy has. It does look good, but what looks great is the pearlescent quality to his skull like head. I probably appreciated that more than I should, but it looks really great. I've raved before about just how good Masterverse figures look and this is no exception. The Mrs got me Hordak as a Christmas gift as she knows just how much I like him and this is a GREAT higher quality toy of him. I can't find anything bad to say about this toy, it just feels like art.

Summoning Monstroid

 

Not too long ago I talked about the Monstroids here. It was always odd that there was a groups of 'evil transforming robots' in the cartoons, but in the toy line Monstroid was an individual robot monster who worked with the Evil Horde. If you've never seen him, Monstroid is a really large toy that looks like a crab. The top half spins around chaotically which make the body rock around. Said rocking makes Monstroid walk around on his long legs in whatever direction gravity takes him. Stick a figures arms or legs in those claws and watch them be flung around like rag dolls. It's pure insanity and maybe a broken lamp if the figure flies loose from the evil grip of MONSTROID.

The big guy didn't get much fiction time aside from random art appearances. However he did show up in a comic story in which The Evil Horde summons him from Sea of Rakash. Under Hordak's magic spell, Monstroid attacks He-Man and Skeletor. Orko and Extendar save the two and Multi-Bot is eaten in the process. It's nice that such a chaotic toy is just as out of control in his fictional debut. I like that without a doubt, Monstroid is a monster. He's aligned with The Evil Horde, but that's basically thanks to a spell. In any other situation, there's just a giant robot-crab thing that's going to kill everything in it's path. I also like the fact that a living robotic creature that lives in the sea without any explanation and we're just supposed to go with it. Pure chaos on every front.

Fright Fighter, Come Fight It If You Dare

I'm not sure what Skeletor's intentions with the Fright Fighter are. Either he's going to fight by frightening you, or going to fight something frightening. I'm assuming it was one of the days where he didn't take a survey on what to call the newest Evil Warriors vehicle. Or did. Webstor probably spammed the ballot box. 

Either way, it's a giant dragon fly. 

The Fright Fighter is pretty on brand. The dragon fly plane this has big flapping wings, pinching pincers (in case they want to kidnap Snout Spout), and various lasers for shooting Heroic Warriors from the sky. It's a pretty good looking vehicle as well. A purple and black plane that looks just enough like a dragon fly without being over the top. Which is where the winner takes it all. Apparently in some comic stories, the Fright Fighter is an Evil Horde vehicle. Which makes sense. They could park it behind the Fright Zone and debate if they're fighting frights or fighting with frights.

Grizzlor's Scary Face

On Eternia, He-Man and The Heroic Warriors face a living horror show on a regular basis. You've got Skeletor and The Evil Warriors. King Hiss and the Snake Men. Then there's Hordak and The Evil Horde taking Skeletor's gimmick and turning it up to 11. Instead of a skeleton faced wizard, you've got a skull faced demon. Instead of Beastman, you've got Grizzlor. Beastman is basically a jungle wild man who can control animals. Grizzlor is a freaking murderous urban legend that works for Hordak. 

Literally.

In his introductory mini-comic, Grizzlor is the scary story told around the camp fire by The Heroic Warriors, Eternia's version of Cropsey if you will. Like all urban legends, Grizzlor is based on something real. Unfortunately the real thing he's based on is actually the same thing told on Eternian creepypasta and has started working for Hordak. His one weakness is his own reflection. Which scares him away.

Other depictions of Grizzlor tone that down a bit. In UK comics he got a different background, being a raging beast among his normally peaceful people before being noticed by Horde Prime. In cartoons, he's more or less a monster henchman. Grizzlor was to be in the early 2000's cartoon, but it got canceled with The Evil Horde making a brief appearance in a flashback. He's in the Netflix She-Ra cartoon, but honestly I haven't watched it. I'm pretty G1 about MOTU.

I made the comparison between Hordak and Skeletor up above. Somebody behind the scenes clearly got the two mixed up also as Beastman in the Master of the Universe movie is seemingly based on the cartoon version of Grizzlor. Grizzlor's gotten some toys over the years. His original featured a ton of fur that often got pretty gross overtime from kids and their inherit grossness. Like most Evil Horde members, he comes with the skull crossbow.

There's some releases in the Classics line, one's a homage the original figure and another his cartoon appearance. There's a ReAction figure and a Pop. There could be others that I'm unaware of, but the most famous of them all is the black variant of the original figure. In which so many were produced with a black face instead of a brown one. It's pretty gnarly looking, almost makes me wish that was the normal one. 

Eternia's Tower Of Power

There was a lot of members of the Heroic Warriors, each pretty unique in their own right. You had flying dudes, dudes with big fists, dudes with guns, and then you had Extendar. Extendar was a cyborg knight who had the ability to extend himself (get it) into a giant when things got tough. 

Fictionally he was a friend of Prince Adam's who was just a regular knight. Wishing he had special powers (I mean, apparently EVERYONE else has them), Hordak promises him them and does follow through. Giving him the power to transform into his new Tower of Power mode. 

Also Hordak turns him into his mindless slave because bad guys generally do that sort of thing. He-Man helps him break free of Hordak's spell and Extendar now has the super powers he craved. Also now his name made sense after all this time. Before that was just his name. Because Eternia.

There was also another origin story featured in UK comics in which Extendar and Dragstor of The Evil Horde were originally friends. A kidnapping by Hordak turned them into their super powered cyborg selves. Extendar was able to break free of Hordak's mind control, but Dragstor wasn't. Extendar went on trying to free his friend of Hordak's control as an ongoing plot. 

As a toy, Extendar is a more complex than the standard MOTU figure. He's thicker knight with basic standard articulation except for his waist and head. A really sharp looking figure too, pearlescent white with copper accents and a big red shield. To transform him, you literally just extend out his parts. It's in his name.

Knees, elbows, waist, and neck extend to form the Tower of Power. The extensions are sculpted with circuitry detail and a peace symbol on his neck. Because Eternia. The shield also unfolds into a larger shield as now he's a much bigger target. There's a MOTU Classics update in which the extensions are snap together parts instead of the extending gimmick. Also included is a lance that really fits in with the whole knight theme and I wish was included with the original toy.

I hope Mattel fits him into the newer toys. He was always this great figure that stood apart from the others. I don't want to say because he was a giant... but that was why. However, he transformed into the giant, making him even more unique. If he was a knight that didn't transform he'd still be pretty great. Wonder what his name would be then? Earl?

The Evil Horde Is Even More Evil In Germany

Hey Rob, it's been a while since you've said anything about the walking Halloween decorations that He-Man has to fight. You know what reader? You're right! Let's clear that up with this particularly spooky German commercial for new Evil Horde figures. When I say haunted house, I mean it. He-Man is walking in the some creepy woods and the new members jump out and scare him. Haunted House ass stuff right here.

Dragstor, who's basically a walking car engine with a tire in his chest pulls up. Multi-Bot, the robot companion to Modulok, swaps heads. But the award for most effective jump scare goes to the Horde Trooper. Horde Troopers are Hordak's robot foot soldiers and probably the most common source of disposable cannon fodder. The toy's gimmick was exploding to simulate the many deaths of Horde Troopers in battle.

Ever been in a haunted house? It's usually decorated somewhat scarily and various workers jump out to scare you in costume. The bigger the budget, the better the costumes and decorations, so it's not just the cashier from Subway with a white face and some fake blood. A big budget one transports you to this imagined world and that's really a scary monster jumping out and scaring you. Unfortunately they all say stupid lines regardless of the budget. This commercial is a big budget haunted house, in Dragstor you've got the guy who slides up and scares folks in the parking lot. In Multi-Bot you've got a variation of the headless freak. But in The Horde Trooper, you've got the walking pile of gore.

The funny thing is, Horde Trooper variations isn't the only type of foot soldier employed by The Evil Horde. There's wraiths, giant insects, and skeletons riding scary horses. Hordak's headquarters is a haunted cave. His entire army is a bunch of monsters and demons. That's in addition to Skeletor's gang and I've not even touched upon the Snake Men yet. There's got to be a support group on Eternia for citizens who have jump scare induced health issues. The entire planet is one giant Walgreen's Halloween section with He-Man and The Heroic Warriors usually wearing brown pants. You know, if it happens, maybe it'll blend in.

The Evil Ass Horde

Despite his often displayed smile, He-Man had it pretty rough. At any moment he'd have to defend Eternia against Skeletor and his walking Halloween decoration army. Fortunately for He-Man they're pretty incompetent. The Evil horde though, not so much. The Halloween decoration comparison is one I usually make when talking about He-Man, and it's a pretty fair description. The satanic panic of the 80's and 90's often used Masters of the Universe as a talking point and it's not hard to see where they're coming from. Skull faced wizards and castles make for common scary stuff. Hordak and his crew turned the spooky shit up to 11.

From out of backward played heavy metal incantations to Eternia, The Evil Horde looked like walking nightmares available for sale at Walmart intended for children to play with. Walking nightmares for sale at Walmart intended for children to play with that live in a haunted cave. If the inspiration for Skeletor came from a prop in a haunted house, Hordak must have been inspired by a college ouija board session that went wrong.

One thing I've always admired about The Evil Horde is the bat symbol. Just this great symbol of unification among the members that not only signifies their allegiance, but looks cool as hell. There's also the gargoyle head crossbow that nearly every member comes with. I certainly appreciate the uniformity the group posses. As much variety each member brings, they all still rock the symbol and pack that crossbow. Even walking nightmares appreciate team solidarity.

Masters Of The Mall

Mattel took it upon themselves in 1986 to set up a mall display in Indiana. This display was nothing short of amazing and maybe a little crazy. To start off, you've got a meet and greet with Hordak. One of the bad guys. There he is, just shaking hands with small children. Scary demon monster kissing babies. He-Man was a pretty big target of the satanic panic of the 80's and sometimes when looking back... you kinda see where those folks were coming from.

I can't mention Masters of the Universe without comparing it to a bunch of Halloween decorations, so I'll just point out the obvious spookiness of a skull faced mountain in the middle of a mall courtyard. A skull faced mountain that you enter through it's mouth. I can't say that without picturing a Castle Grayskull haunted attraction. Dang.

Inside the attraction a mountain scene with many of the 1986 MOTU toys on display, complete with narration and lights showcasing each one! This is pretty darn cool, especially with the Eternia play set on display. That thing was always amazing and looks fancier than the rest of the display. What takes it to another level is the projections of He-Man and Skeletor fighting it out on the mountain. That's theme park level stuff in a mall food court.

He-Man's Power Sword is off model though. They'll have He-Man appear and I'll usually make sure the sword looks right. If Hordak's outside recruiting new members of the Evil Horde at Panda Express, the sword is the least of our problems. The least of yours anyway, I'm nonsensically specific about a few things and that's the wrong fucking sword.

The Scary Ass Fright Zone

Earlier today I was playing with my new Master of the Universe Mega Construx figures and found myself thinking about what old stuff I'd like to see in the line. Which lead me straight to thinking about the awesome Fright Zone. The most somebody glued together some Halloween decorations He-Man bag guy spooky shit ever. It's every haunted cave you've ever seen and sold to small children. He-Man and his crew was the target of a lot of the Satanic Panic of the 80's and they kinda had a point.

Regardless, it was a cool play set with all sorts of scary stuff included. You had the before spoken haunted cave with a gnarly prison. A scary ass tree that would grab you without consent. But the most horrifying and diabolical feature... the puppet monster that'd eat the shit out of you. Thirty something years later and it just now occurs to me that the prison is a red herring. Yeah He-Man, just try to rescue Buzz-Off as seen in the above picture. Boom, monster eats your whole ass.

I don't know if you took notice in the commercial way at the beginning in my typical way of using old commercials to set the scene for a post, but the monster did not ever actually say The Fright Zone. Neither did the tree or Hordak even. It was just some guy yelling off screen. I cannot just explain how much a classmate of mine didn't believe me when I told him the monster doesn't actually say 'THE FRIGHT ZONE'. In hindsight, maybe his did.

The Power To Go On Tour

As an avid subscriber of Masters of the Universe magazine, I don't have to tell you I was sold instantly on the Power Tour. Though being in the third grade... I didn't get to make these types of decisions on my own. BBBBuuuuttttttttt the thing is pretty much all over the internet and I could watch it if I want to. Looking back, it might have been a good idea not to go as holy crap did Skeletor have his own haunted house at the show or something? I've made my joke about He-Man's villains being a bunch of Halloween decorations before, but holy shit ALL of the villains look straight our of a Spirit Halloween clearance sale. I'd like to point out that each time I typed Power Tour while writing this, I accidentally typed Pour Tour. Because Orko looked drunk.

Thunder Punch He-Man will beat the shit out of you

It's a crime that I haven't taken the time to talk about my favorite version of He-Man ever. Talking about Thunder Punch He-Man of course, the best Master of the Universe. What makes this particular version so special? Let's start small, look at that fabulous red outfit. It just looks better than his standard outfit. If you noticed he looks a bit beefier in this incarnation, you're not imagining things, Thunder Punch powers makes the most powerful man in the universe even more stronger. More powerful in the form of an explosive right hook. Regular He-Man is strong, Thunder Punch knock your ass out.

That great looking red outfit contains a red backpack that you insert cap-gun caps into. With a twist of the waist and He-Man punches with an explosive pow complete with satisfying gun powder smoke. On Eternia, if you smell gun powder smoke, He-Man just stomped a mud hole in Hordak's ass and walked it dry.

Adding to the overall superiority of this He-Man is his weapons. You've got a bright yellow power sword that just looks so much better in that yellow than it did in silver. Not to mention his cool chrome shield that can also holster said better looking sword holy crap this toy is amazing. With little details like his white rimmed books, Thunder Punch He-Man always felt like a more premium action figure. Of course in my eyes it is a premium action figure, the most master a Master of the Universe could ever be.

The Evil Horde