That's no moon...bot

While I've been looking forward to the Star Wars Micro Galaxy Squadron toys (only seen Boba Fett in stores, waiting for the smaller sets first), I was reminded of another cool Star Wars line from the past. Star Wars Transformers debuted in late 2005 and were pretty neat. I still recall when the news first hit of the crossover line, most fans anticipated things like Jetfire turning into an X-Wing. However the line ultimately ended up being something different. The toys were classic Star Wars vehicles that turned into robots based on a classic character piloted by a little figure of said character. It wasn't what I expected initially, but I was sold on the idea instantly. Similar to Animorphs before it, these were Transformers branded toys not connected to the greater TF fiction. Of course this ruffled some feathers... but what doesn't?

The toys themselves were pretty neat. Not only did they feature the inch man style pilots that I so love (I wonder if those will fit in the Micro Galaxy Squadron?), but they also featured some genuinely cool designs. One particular thing I've always liked was how lightsabers were used. Of course the robot would use them as a weapon, but in vehicle mode they'd be firing missiles. Think about how a laser looks in Star Wars when it's being show (pew pew) and then think about a lightsaber. That's pretty dang clever! 

My favorite of the toys was the Darth Vader Death Star. The figure was large and the Death Star could contain those tiny pilot figures. A cool extra touch was the inclusion of small Tie Fighters that had simple robot modes themselves. They were pretty basic, but made for some cool drones to assist the giant Vader in battle. Probably the coolest extra was a cloth cape. Darth Vader has a cape, we all know this. However a giant robot that turns into a moon sized planet destroying space station with a cape? BADASS. This was a seriously cool figure that was all toy. Star Wars Transformers was a really great line that ran for years. I'd liked a cartoon, a game, or some kind of other fiction. However Star Wars isn't exactly hurting for fiction or games, so I can understand why there was none. Still wish there was a Darth Vader that transformed into a scorpion.

Transform Squadron 32: 8 MEGS to harm you with

 Listen Now!

This month- Rob briefly talks about the days of zines before going into summer leading into the Halloween season. Then he talks about buying Beast Wars toys on clearance back in the day. At some point the power goes out. I don't know... it was weird.

Invasions On VHS

I usually skip past the previews on my videos these days. I'm not sure if these little collections of kids videos still get promo spots before the movie starts. Admittedly, in today's world of on demand... it's probably just a blurb with a picture on the series Facebook page. I admit now that my nostalgia for VHS stems from really enjoying a trip to the video store. You know, that'd be a cool store to do again. It wouldn't have to actually sell videos, but maybe oddball things like snacks and merchandising. Maybe prepaid cards for services. Look, I just want to go to Blockbuster. Is that so wrong?

Mutant Beast Wars

The year was 2000, and even though Beast Wars was technically over and replaced with Beast Machines, there was still plenty of Beast Wars toys on the shelves. Since reruns of Beast Wars were steadily running on Fox Kids on weekday afternoons, it was natural to stock Beast Wars figures with the Beast Machines figures. The Fox Kids versions of Beast Wars toys were neato recolors of BW toys that took advantage of kids who saw those reruns and wanted a Transmetal Cheetor. With this and Animorph Transformers toys stocked with Beast Machines, there was a lot of beast themed Transformers on the shelves.

Animorphs wasn't a successes (I mean, I liked the toys... but that was something I found out after they went on clearance), however a company doesn't start out to fail at something and there was a few Animorph Transformers toys designed that went unused in the line. Somebody had the idea to remold the human bits into robot parts and release them.

So there you had the Mutants of the Beast Wars, The Mutant Beast Wars! What made them mutants exactly? Well, thanks to a virus unleashed by Megatron, these Fuzors were lost in their beast modes. Transforming from beast mode to beast mode with the robot lost inside (but maybe you could find their robot head peeking out). In case that description and the picture above doesn't clue you in, they don't have a robot mode. Icebird, for example, turns from owl to bear.

Like Animorphs, they were great toys, but now they were actual Transformers (not just in name). Though like their Animorph heritage, they were misfits in the Transformers fan world. As one could expect the G1 Purist crowd obviously despised them. A good deal of the beast era fans also wasn't fond. Though a handful of us did, and personally I loved them.

I was all over the figures the moment they arrived at my local Walmart. In fact the first one I grabbed was Icebird (my favorite of the bunch) one Friday night. I had the night off and took a quick stop to check out the toys and grab a bite to eat. An excited jump in the air lead to grabbing Icebird and a pack of chicken wings. That evening was spent with a toy I couldn't put down and messy homemade buffalo wings. Mutant Beast Wars didn't have any fiction outside the text blurb on the packaging. If I was a better writer, I probably would have written tomes of terrible fan fiction. The Mutants DID however appear briefly in 3H's BotCon comics. While they didn't get the biggest starring role, I was glad for something. Later they made some various low key fictional appearances in IDW comics and Fun Publications Fan fiction. Soundwave even made appearances in E-Hobby and Kre-O manga.

The Mutants never got any extra members, though some fans speculated Savage/Noble (Beast Changer) could be a Mutant. The 'Ask Vector Prime' Facebook Page (ran by Fun Publications) said in some realities he was and in some realities all BW characters were Mutants. Which I suppose in some reality is an answer and in some reality the alternate reality trope isn't played out yet (but Thanos still wins). All jokes aside, I've never considered him to be a member, but if you want to go ahead. There's a multiverse shoehorn for that.

Another would be new member is Leatherhide. A planned repaint of the Soundwave mold for the ill-fated Halloween Horrocon sub-line (that's a nifty name, huh), Leatherhide would probably be released as an Autobot, but a Mutant in any fiction. Leatherhide fictionally did appear in The Allspark Almanac volume 2 and in Fun Publications fiction meaning I'm not the only person who really wanted this toy.

Mutant Beast Wars over the course of time has managed to remain obscure in the greater world of Transformers with a little nod here and there. An odd team of misfits loved by some and despised by others. I suppose for the opposing team it's a good thing they didn't take off. Though as someone who came close to buying a test shot at a BotCon, I would have loved for them to take flight. The little nods here and there are great (and appreciated), but in some alternate universe I have a display of Mutant Beast Wars Masterpiece toys.

Animorphs Transformers

I've written about Animorphs Transformers toys here before.

But, you know... it's been awhile.

In which I talk about old comercials

For some reason, I've always loved commercials. Well, I'm not concerned about the newest laundry detergent commercial, but old toy or cartoons? Yeah, love it. I always laugh at myself for my YouTube habits. While most people with my hobbies are watching reviews or play through videos, I'm mainly watching old commercials or some nonsense tv show. Before YouTube, I remember this TF fan site that was just an archive of old commercials in real media format. At one point I was even in talks with the owner to take over it as he was looking to offload it. Somewhere I still have that CD-RW with all the files. Sometime while I was watching these silly old ads, it occurred to me it probably would make a somewhat decent post. So uh...

Overlord is one of those oddball Transformers, one of the big bad guys of Masterforce, he found his way to European release. This is just a simple advert that sells the toy with some great animation. I like how energetic the voice over is as well.

Turbomasters and Predators were some of those late G1 going into G2 that never came out in the US. Personally, I would have loved them at the time. I've got a few, and some of the molds were released in the US under other lines. When I see all the homages to older figures in Generations, I feel these really awesome toys are overlooked. Sure, Thunder Clash gets attention (as does Overlord), and Scorch got an update as a BotCon toy (as did Thunder Clash), but man I'd love more focus.

G2 era toys never fail to fascinate me. They are the perfect realization of the classic Transformers concept. While toy technology has went forward and these are older figures, there's no denying the charm they have. When G2 gets homages, it's usually towards the neon repaints of G1 figures and mostly ignoring the original creations (aside from the occasional nod). When I see pics of the upcoming Tiny Turbo Changers, part of me see's these smaller G2 toys and think the engineering could be shrunken down to make a wonderful non movie series.

In an earlier post, I talked about the infamous Animorph Transformers toy line. And while I said enough there, I figured it would be a good ending point to this post. Maybe one day those 'bastard Transformers' will get their moment in the sun. Until then, I'll just be content with pretending to be some robot toy hipster who enjoyed something nobody else did.

Still never watched the show.

You're not supposed to like them

More than meets the... hell is that?

Picture this, if you will, what if Hasbro made Animorphs toys? What if they made a transforming toy line based on Animorphs? Oh hey, doesn't Hasbro already have a toy line like that? What if they put the Transformers logo on the packaging and stocked them with the Beast Wars toys?

Well, they did.

Hasbro put the Transformers logo on Animorphs toys to basically help sell them. Beast Wars was still a powerhouse on the store shelves and another animal based Transformers toyline had to sell like hotcakes right? The toys were stocked with the BW toys regardless of the actual lack of relation.

It landed with a dull thud.

The toys just didn't sell for any number of reasons. Within the TF fandom, they were regarded poorly and called every negative thing one could imagine. Personally I wasn't sold either and just focused on the new Transmetal 2 toys arriving on shelves.

So, it didn't take long for them to get marked down for low clearance prices. Which is pretty much where I came in. Being a broke community college student, the idea of a $3 TF was too tempting to pass up.

So I started buying them.

I knew going in that these were not my beloved BW toys. I knew they were abominations and I was supposed to feel ashamed of myself for buying them. I kept it secret. My shame in giving these bastards a home was deep. Ok, maybe not to deep.

Turns out, they were really good toys.

As time went on, the clearance supply dried out (never got that Tobias hawk, and still kicking myself for passing on the T-Rex Combiner) and my nights of $3 action figure fun was over. I proudly stood my Animorphs next to my Beast Warriors and took up for the dark horse in the TF section.

Luck would have it that Hasbro found a way to release some unused Animorphs molds in Beast Wars, as the new Mutants sub line. The new figures transformed from one animal to another! The human kibble was remolded into robot kibble. What resulted was a short lived and controversial Transformers toy line.

Of course I loved them.

I loved the Mutants so much, I held onto hope that the line would continue and maybe even get animated. Of course I was dreaming an impossible dream and the Mutants left as quickly as they arrived.

During the original Universe line, rumor had it that the Animorphs molds were to be used as Pretenders (that could of been awesome) and the Mutants Soundwave mold was planned to get a use in the canceled Walmart Halloween Horrorcon toys.

I know I'm alone in my enjoyment of a failed Transformers toyline. Or practically alone, but I don't care. I had a really fun time with the toys when they were out. Not everyone can say that, or would be willing to give them a chance. But it gives me a chance to be hipster over something.

Ok, that was reaching.