Saturday, September 21, 2019

Hell yeah Haunted Mansion... not that one

The problem with most haunted attractions is that they look super great until you actually go inside one. Between the cheesy black plastic hung up standing in for walls and the workers annoying you with bad acting, you kind of regret going. Not to mention the only real scares after a certain age are jump scares, and well, I'm pretty sure we've all been startled by the toaster on occasion. Sure the big budget ones like Halloween Horror Nights are amazing, but your local haunt is usually pretty ratchet.

If it's a charity haunt, you're more likely to look past the cheesiness as it's for a good cause. A local for profit... well... I paid 20$ to get in here and the damn cashier from the gas station that wears the same Marilyn Manson shirt every day is apparently a vampire... and still wearing that shirt... just jumped out. It startled me initially and now he's saying really stupid lines. I'm switching gas stations.

Though when you look at pictures or even old commercials for them, like the Haunted Mansion (no relation) commercial above, it's pretty charming. Though age helps. Those older ones have a charm that can't be replicated. Admittedly it's perspective, the witch was the lady who works at the bowling alley and wore the same Dio shirt every day.

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